I let a mermaid guest post.

     Hello Buoys and Pearls...

     Okay let me stop you right here. I apologize in advance. I'm letting a friend of mine try blogging and this will probably be the last time because let me warn you, former mermaids are weird, like really weird. She's forgotten most of what she knew due to her mermaid magic rejecting her gills forcing her to walk on land for probably the rest of her life and she may never get the hang of interacting with humans so please ignore her jokes and her weirdness. You can find a link to her twitter here (right here)
     Thank you - Maridan

     Who does a mermaid date? Her buoy-friend.

     Do you get it? I heard humans use jokes to break the frozen water, how am I doing so far? Blogging is so much fun. I don't know why Maridan doesn't blog everyday.

     Okay again let me step in to clarify something. She can barely use a computer, I have to edit all her photos, she's the one annoying me day in and day out and moaning about the sea she misses with all those weird mermaid names for everything. She can barely remember what a starfish is, I have to keep a list of translations for her when she tweets. By the way a starfish is a hugsy and an octopus is a big hugsy and a squid is a nopesy. Getting the picture yet, mermaids, former mermaids make terrible roommates but ask me another time to go into detail
     - Maridan

     Do you know what's amazing about land? Blankets, blankets are amazing. Gasp, I gasped, I wrote it down so you would know. Did you know humans have a blanket just for mermaids? Maridan is so mean, she won't get me one. Its so unfair, I see her looking at them on the computer all the time but when I ask her she gives me one of those smooshed looks where her face gets all unfriendly. What was that look called, a flounder...a clown...a something, a smooshed look.

     How many times am I going to have to put last minute notes into this post of hers? I am not buying her a mermaid blanket when I can't even get myself one. She doesn't even have two shells to her name much less human money and I am not splurging on every whim of hers. Last time it was a red mermaid tail blanket, this time it's a gray one.
     - Maridan

     I am excited about the human holiday fishmas. It is in the time of the frozen water where frozen water comes from the sky as a great gift but we cannot swim in it, the frozen water is too cold and makes my face her to try diving into the frozen sea that greets us each winter. I love fishmas but it surprisingly has very little to do with fish. I will have to find the fish for this fishmas this year. What fish decorations do you have for fishmas? Maridan says I'm weird and I'm too obnosharks to explain everything to and tells me to use the goobily goob to gooble but the goobily goob doesn't like me and when i type in goobily goob fishmas it has nothing to do with fishmas at all so this goobily goob is not very good at their job.

     Again, I try correcting her but there is really no point. She insists it's fishmas and when I try to correct her goobily goob mistake she starts muttering about my mernonk talk. From what I understand mer means people which is obvious even to me and nonk is the sound a seal makes. Again, former mermaids are stubborn and impossible to reason with and this will probably be the last post I let her write because if she's annoying me she's probably annoying you so go ahead, stop reading as it will probably get much worse before it ends. Also before I forget 'obnosharks' means obnoxious and it's obnoxious how she says it wrong.
     Sorry - Maridan

     Guess what, guess what, Maridan said she'd make me a marimo travel friend. I love marimo, marimo are awesome. She has one but she won't let me touch it because it was a gift. It is so pretty and glass and hangs from a cord which she places around her neck and she won't let me touch it even though I promised not to break it but she keeps pointing out that I broke Speck's jar and lost him on the carpet. It was an accident. She shouldn't have kept her rocks right under Speck's shelf. I looked and looked but Speck disappeared into the carpet sea. She is going to make a second Speck but I will make sure she doesn't put her rocks below this one.

     For the longest time I thought BFF meant best fins forever. I thought they were all talking about keeping their fins pretty. I guess it doesn't translate well.

     Gasp...oh bubbles, oh bubbles, Maridan is going to never let me borrow computer again. I spilled water and she told me to not have water near her computer.

     No worries, the water was spilled on the floor not my computer. she kicked it over but I'm not going to tell her what I meant with that warning. It took her about two hours write this much. Sorry for such a strange post written by an even stranger person. Since there's no pictures here I'll share her profile picture from twitter so you can easily find her account and follow it if you like the occasional mermaid tweet or repostings of mermaid or marimo stuff. if you tag her in your tweets about mermaids or marimo she loves seeing those.
     - Maridan

Oh no, what have I done? I went and let a mermaid write a guest post on my blog. Here's a tip, think twice before letting your mermaid friend write a post on your blog. Especially if they can be kind of annoying because they likely will try to get more blog posts out of you in the future.  If you don't wan to read this...yeah I don't blame you. Who wants to listen to a weird mermaid attempt blogging for the first time?  I had to add notes just so people would understand her. Good luck, this might be the last time I let a mermaid guest post. #mermaid #guestpost #blogger #mermaidblogger

Disclaimer...ugh, seriously mermaids are disgusting sometimes. I just found peanut butter on my mouse...someone went and told her mice love cheese and peanut butter but she ate the cheese and tried to feed it peanut butter. Now I have to have a long talk about how words can be the same but mean different things like computer mice not being animal mice. I hope this blog post wasn't too strange, I've already got a large headache from having to deal with her blogging once. Feel free to complain a little in the comments about how mermaids are stubborn and pretty much spoiled selfish (which she thinks is a compliment because it has the word fish in it)


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